Cut Down on the Caffeine!

Proof of my love affair with caffeine in my single years!

If you are anything like me, this one suggestion hits you where it hurts!  I would gladly give up many things to have a baby but NOT my coffee please! Yet if you are thinking of conceiving and the Starbucks barrista knows your order the moment you walk in, you may have to consider reducing the amount of coffee you are currently consuming. This as well goes for those of you who can't function in the mornings without that cup of java, or can't get through a work day without several cups of your french toast.

Along with many other side affects, coffee is known to cause miscarriages and it would also be wise for you to go through its withdrawal symptoms before you actually try to conceive let alone get pregnant!

Even though caffeine is a natural substance that stimulated the central nervous system making you feel more alert; it also has several harmful side affects.  Studies show that an excess amount of caffeine can trigger a fast heart rate, insomnia, anxiety and restlessness.  Abruptly stopping the use of caffeine can lead to withdrawal symptoms such as headaches and irritablility.  Yes, caffeine has been proven to boost your memory, concentration and mental health.  Caffeine possibly my even decrease the risk of Alzhiemer's disease and certain cancers.  But have you ever heard about the Caffeine Contraceptive?

New York magazine previously reported: Women generally metabolize caffeine faster than men. Smokers process it twice as quickly as nonsmokers do. Women taking birth-control pills metabolize it at perhaps one-third the rate that women not on the Pill do. Asians may do so more slowly than people of other races. In The World of Caffeine: The Science and Culture of the World’s Most Popular Drug, authors Bennett Alan Weinberg and Bonnie K. Bealer hypothesize that a nonsmoking Japanese man drinking his coffee with an alcoholic beverage -- another slowing agent -- would likely feel caffeinated “about five times longer than an Englishwoman who smoked cigarettes but did not drink or use oral contraceptives.”

Doctors don't always agree on how much caffeine is safe once you ARE pregnant.  Some allow the equivalent to one small cup of have a day.  Thats about 100 milligrams, but most recommend you stopping entirely, especially in the first trimester.

Don't forget that caffeine is not only found in coffee but soda, tea, energy drinks and even in pain medications.  A 12-ounce can of soda or an 8 ounce cup of green / black tea can contain 30-60 milligrams of caffeine! Two tablets of extra strength Excederin have 130 milligrams of caffeine! You have to calculate the amount of daily caffeine that you are consuming from those sources along with the coffee.  Read labels and ingredients before consuming!

I was born into a family where coffee was a relaxing part of our morning routine, and a treat after family lunch as we bonded.  Coffee brakes, coffee shops, and coffee dates were an exciting escape brake from life!   In my college years, I would leave for work extra early to buy my Cafe Collata at DD, and I would feel cool sitting in lectures with 100+ students drinking a Frapachino from Starbucks. When I was single, there was nothing more romantic for me to do than to go to a coffee or book shop and spend hours sipping a drink and either reading a book or working on the computer.  When I started teaching, they would offer us free expressos and it would sometimes be the only thing that would get me through the mornings.

What most of you might not know, an excess amount or prolonged intake of caffeine produces ulcers.  In my case this was a blessing more than a curse.  All the years of drinking coffee and caffeinated products had an intricate part in my diagnostic of Ulcerous Colitis.

Ulcerative colitis (Colitis ulcerosa, UC) is a form of inflammatory bowel disease (IBD). Ulcerative colitis is a form of colitis, a disease of the colon (the largest portion of the large intestine), that includes characteristiculcers, or open sores. The main symptom of active disease is usually constant diarrhea mixed with blood, of gradual onset. IBD is often confused with irritable bowel syndrome (IBS).

From seeing my caffeine history (and thankfully Ive never been into sodas or energy drinks), is no mystery why I developed Ulcerative Colitis.  I had several symptoms, mostly that my morning cup of coffee would work as a laxative just half an hour later; yet it took me a year to get my self check out by a doctor!  I had just entered a complicated relationship with my husband then boyfriend, I had begun a demanding new job, and I had moved in with my sickly grandparents all that the SAME time!

Looking back now, I can see how foolish and naive I had been.  Yes I was overwhelmed with responsibilities, but my health should have been my priority!  It was only when I started seeing blood in my bowl movements that I went to a wonderful gastroenterologist who thanks to my merciful Lord, was skilled enough to detect something far more worse and scarier than Ulcerative Colitis.  You might have caught a glimpse of it in my previous post My Husband's Preconception Ultimatum
 But that story is for my next post.

Even though this post was mostly about going off caffein; I hope that I don't have to mention how alcohol, smoking and consuming drugs affects your chances of conceiving and can lead to sever birth defects once pregnant.   Especially during the fetus' critical brain and organ formation at the 3-8 week period.

My cafe outing years

http://instagram.com/babyquezada

My Husband's Preconception Ultimatum

Like most men, my husband has some fear of change, taking on new responsibility and commitment. If it wasn't for my wise grandmother advising him to take up the opportunity of a sale on engagement rings on Christmas Eve; he wouldn't have proposed only 6 months into our relationship! Likewise, if it wasn't for the passing of both of my grandparents, we wouldn't have gotten married after only being together for a year and a half.  So it shouldn't have surprised me that the decision of when to try to conceive would also be delayed, postponed and met with several requirements!

I also should have been more wiser to Gods plans. I always dreamt  that I would be married by 24 years of age, like my mother but had to wait until I was 29. I had planned on getting to know my boyfriend / fiancé for at least two years before marring yet was engaged by 6 months and marred in less than two years. Ideally I had wanted to spend a little over two years enjoying our young newlywed years before getting pregnant but then my biological clock kicked in and we decided to begin looking after our first anniversary.

To be honest I began to worry when I calculated the fact that I would be turning 30 soon and we wanted at least 3 kids.  So with the minimum of two years between each child that meant that I would be almost forty by the time we had our last baby! YIKES!!! (Thats also not calculating any complications / miscarriages).  So I suggested we start trying at 6 months, which my husband wisely pushed to 8 months, then a year.

Thanks to the Lord, I listened his decision and trusted in the Lord's will. Yet when my husband pushed the date from April to June I agreed but said that it would be our last postponement! So now that I felt assured and more comfortable with our decision; I distracted my "baby fever" with strengthening our relationship, enjoying holidays, my last year at work, preparing my house and checking off all the things we wanted to do before the baby arrived. I began this blog and casually prepared a pregnancy Pinterest account.

Everyone around me was getting pregnant. Both my and my husbands Facebook accounts were bombarded with babies! Yet I waited until May to bring it up to my husband and to openly begin speaking to others of our intentions (just within a selective group of close friends & family).

It was at this moment when my husband and I got stuck. I had begun taking folic acid, stepped up my workout routine & schedule, got off birth control in February etc. etc...  Yet my husband tried to postpone the baby conception once more for august!  On top of that, he also gave me seven requirements before we would begin:

1. To be off birth control for at least 3 months, and he even tried to extend it to 6 months after reading an article online! I flipped out and reminded him that by June I would meet the 3 month requirement.

2. To go to the dentist and remove some old cavities because of infection; so I'm doing so.

3. Take antibiotics for intestinal bacteria / parasites with him for 14 days; and we're half way through that.

4. Our marriage has to be stable.  Check! We are blessed to have been in a honeymoon phase fore months now, thanks to the Lords great help!

 5. Do a detox / cleanse.  That one I got a bit upset with him about because we have been on an organic mostly gluten free diet for over a year now and we practically have become vegetarians! I did so mostly for him and to control my weight/health, so don't want to restrict myself even more! So that's a no to that one!

6. Let a doctor examine our blood work; which I am excited about and going to do so after we're done with the antibiotic treatment were on.

7. I saved the best for last: Being that he works in a hospital, his physician co-workers recommend that I get a colonoscopy! 

Two years ago I had a cystic tumor on my colon along with colitis.  The tumor was none-cancerous and was surgically removed.  Also, with our drastic change of diet, my colitis symptoms have disappeared!  My doctors advised me that after a year or two my wounds would be healed enough to give birth and that I would need a colonoscopy after three years not two!  Yet I must be responsible and cautious.  My body won't loner be just mine, but a miraculous incubator for our future baby and I must secure the chances of any preventable problems that might be lurking.

Some of you might have sensed a theme repeating itself through out this post.  Worry and anxiety are a huge and normal part of pregnancy, but one must be careful not to let it grow out of control to where it becomes sinful or even affect the baby.  So we must be proactive in watching out for any signs of unneeded and premature worry / anxiety leaving all our doubt and concern in God's capable hands.  So in a future blog I will detail the course of action that I am beginning and will hopefully continue to take with my propensity towards worry.

http://instagram.com/babyquezada

Detoxify & Cleanse

 Detoxify & Cleanse 

You are what you eat, and so shall your child be too!

The zygote, embryo, placenta and fetus grow from the egg and spec cells.  If every couple planning for a pregnancy ate healthy as if they BOTH were pregnant, the fertilized egg would definitely be healthier and eventually will thank you for it!  Remember that it takes two sets of 23 chromosomes from the mother and father to produce a human being.  We always hear about how important it is for the mother to get enough folate and be cautious of her pre-conception diet but the father's nutritional diet and contribution to pregnancy often goes unnoticed.  Fortunately for me, my husband is just as eager to go on this pre-concieveing cleanse as I am!

Besides helping you shed a few unneeded pounds before a pregnancy, cleansing is important PRIOR to  conception because it helps strengthen and tone the detoxification organs.  One thing that you will learn quickly once pregnant, is that your body is a divinely created machine!!! That fact alone takes my breath away!   We should care for and as the Bible states, treat our bodies as a temple of the Holy Spirit.  

The detoxification organs experience increased stress during pregnancy, so you should make sure that every inch of your body (along with your heart and soul) is in peak condition for healthy fertilization.  Especially your liver , kidneys and veins.  A properly functioning liver is able to clear 99 percent of toxins from the blood before that blood is generated to the rest of the body.  If it has been already overwhelmed with alcohol, junk food and other toxic consumption it will not be able to function when you most need it!!!

I have been reducing my destructive aliment for a few months now and am going a bit above and beyond by going to get my blood work done to make sure that there isn't anything that I am no aware of and should take measures.

AVOID:
1. GMOs (Genetically Modified Organisms) 
GMO's are plants and animals that have been genetically engineered in a laboratory with DNA from other plants, animals, bacteria & viruses.  They are added to processed foods as oils, sweeteners, and soy proteins; and in things like amino acids, aspartame, vitamin C, flavorings (natural & artificial), maltodextrins and more

Have you ever heard about Contraceptive Corn:

Farmers throughout America had already been complaining about GMO corn that caused their livestock to become infertile and also spontaneously abort, wiping out their entire operations, in some cases.

( http://tampa.cbslocal.com/2012/08/04/roundup-herbicide-blamed-for-corn-crop-demise-vilsack-taylor-fda-usda-elizabeth-dougherty-food-nation-radio-network-gmos-pathogen/ )

Organic consumers covers an Austrian study that proved the damaging effect GMO corn has on the reproductive system:
http://www.organicconsumers.org/articles/article_15588.cfm

2. Trans and Saturated Fats
Saturated fat is found in any animal product, such as cheese, milk, beef, butter, etc.; but it is also found in coconut oil and chocolate.  High amounts of saturated fats can lead to high cholesterol (clogging of your arteries) and heart disease.  Saturated fats in moderation in fine but keep it below 7% of your total calories.  
Tans fats on the other hand should be avoided at all costs!  They increase your risk of heart disease and Diabetes.  Trans fats can be found naturally in been and dairy products but the majority in American diets comes from hydrogenated vegetable shortening /oils (deep frying oils).

According to a study published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, consumption of trans fats can increase a woman’s chances of infertility by a whopping 70 percent or more. The amount that caused this difference was the equivalent to what is found in one pack of French fries or one doughnut! (Am J Clin Nutr January 2007 vol. 85 no. 1 231-237)

3. Soy and Estrogen Dominance
Soy is one of the biggest forms of estrogen-mimicking compounds in our environment. Soy/soybean oil, birth control, meat / dairy, farm animals given growth hormones, plastics and other unnatural additions to our environment and food system all contain estrogen-mimicking comp and that cause and overabundance of estrogen hormones in a woman's body and leaves a deficiency of progesterone, the hormone necessary for implantation of an embryo in the beginning weeks of pregnancy.

4. Pesticides / Insecticides / Chemical Fertilizers 
Logic and research make it clear that exposure (maternal & PATERNAL) to farm and lawn chemicals causes infertility, miscarriage, dirty defects and cancer.  These chemeicasls are absorbed into the body through the skin (largest organ in our body) and air!

DRINK LOTS AND LOTS OF WATER to filter out toxins, help prepare your skin, avoid acne, balances you lymph system, speeds your metabolism, produce new blood and muscle cells, purifies colon and makes it easier to absorb nutrients, etc.  I love adding lemon, mint and fruit to add flavor!

The following is a two week  cleans that I did with my girlfriends to clean out my system after a carb loaded vacation 

What my daily breakfast would look like: roasted cocoa chips (not chocolate) with fruit, honey and yogurt; fresh fruit; parfait; fruit and cocoa oatmeal 

Childproof Your Relationship

"It takes a happy parent to raise a happy baby!"

           Ninety percent of married couples report their satisfaction in their relationship declines once they have their first baby!  "Having children is like relationship bootcamp," says Ian Kerner, a sex and relationship counselor and author. "Despite what other parents have experienced with their children, you don't have any idea what's really in store for you until you've lived it." Although you can't truly understand what it's like to be a parent until you become one, you can take steps to keep your future offspring from hurting your relationship now. In fact, when you have a strong relationship, sharing a baby can sometimes bring you closer together.

Preparing our relationship for children is a huge deal for my husband and I.  We have seen first hand how a baby can strain a relationship and know that it will definitely affect ours.  Our first 6 months of marriage were very rough, yet it helped us single out our strengths and weaknesses and helped us form a base on which to construct.

Below I attached some links of articles that greatly helped guide me in working on my role of a wife in our relationship (along with lots of prayer and a strong relationship first and foremost with the Lord). These links are not magic, but they were a great tool when I was in need, lost and desperate for guidance.  I can't stress the importance of a monthly or regular meeting with your pastor or christian psychologist to lead and be accountable to. You shouldn't just go to any psychologist; a Christian counselor / psychologist will guide a couple with the Bible; which automatically stress the authority of God.

Sex and Intimacy have a lot to do with the strength in a relationship.  As my wedding day drew closer many (and I mean MANY) wise women with several years of marriage under their belts advised me never to deny my husband in the marriage bed.  While continuing in counseling, my paster even reaffirmed their advise.  Even though there were plenty of times that I didn't feel like it, or I was uncomfortable or upset with him; I only denied him a hand full of times in our first year of marriage.  Doing so didn't solve some problems, but it sure did avoid many frustrations and kept us united.

Even though you're getting ready to spend plenty of time baby-making, studies suggest that less than one in four couples are satisfied with their post-baby sex lives. After Baby arrives, you'll have plenty of reasons not to have sex (tired, achy, busy), but you have a much better reason to have sex: Without frequent sex, your brain's levels of oxytocin (the so-called "feel-good" hormone) can drop, making you feel emotionally disconnected from your partner. So make sure you have a healthy sex life pre-baby, and don't be afraid to discuss what may come post-pregnancy.

If you're worried about not feeling sexy after going through labor and delivery, experts say that just touching, cuddling, and kissing will help you feel close again. You may not end up having sex, but you have to be intimate in one way or another. You kind of have to put your body through the motions and trust that mind will follow.

A few kind words, a helping hand, or even just a text can go a long way toward making you both feel valued. And you don't have to wait until you become parents to say "thank you" to each other; get in the habit now.

It can be very exciting to work on strengthening your relationship!  Take it as a fun challenge and even reward yourself after a good week.  Become a team, remove all selfish desires and build the foundation for a lifetime!  Remember twenty years goes by in the blink of an eye and soon you will be left alone in an empty nest with either your best friend or a virtual stranger! 

https://www.reviveourhearts.com/resource-library/30-day-challenges/30-day-husband/

http://www.christianwifelife.com/2013/10/31-days-of-respecting-my-husband.html

http://club31women.com/2014/01/truly-encourage-spiritual-life-husband/

http://unveiledwife.com/25-verses-to-pray-over-your-husband/

http://instagram.com/babyquezada

What They Don't Tell You About The Birth Control Pill and Its Side Effects

Get Off The Pill!

Contraceptive pills are prescribed to treat many health issues in addition to preventing pregnancy.  It's considered to be a treatment for gynecological disorders, endometriosis, polycystic ovarian syndrome, and it may help prevent uterine cancer, cervical cancer and ovarian cysts.  Its used to mana premenstrual symptoms, irregular periods, heavy periods, painful periods, and acne.

The pill is great for those who want a sure thing and whose husbands are not huge fans of using condoms. But what you might not know is that your body can go into a frenzy as it tries to balance itself out. Remember, the pill was designed to prevent pregnancy – it flattens your hormones and disrupts the delicate dance they were designed to do.

Here is a list of its side effects that I have researched and how they affect me:

1. It KILLS your libido!!!  I started with this one because for almost a year I believed that there was something wrong with me!  This fact really affected my husband and my relationship in the beginning of our marriage and I have heard testimony from many woman ever since who have had similar experiences!   Some had told me that their sexual drive returned a month after they went of bc but some have told me that it takes longer.  For me personally, it took about three months to feel the spice again.

2. It dries up your hair and nails!!! I didn't understand why my hair had become unrecognizable and my nails would brake so often until I did some research on the pill.  In December my mother, sisters, and even my husband forced me to cut off a few inches of my hair because of its sad state and I had become used to having short nails!  It took only one month and several masques for my hair and nails to feel healthier.  Now three months later I have silky smooth soft strong hair and LONG nails again!!!

3. Depression & Anxiety!!! Traditional hormonal birth control can exacerbate depression and anxiety because of the effect hormones have on the intricate balance or serotonin, dopamine, GABA, and norepinephrine.  All "feel-good" neurotransmitters in the brain.  Estrogen in particular plays a role in depression.  Will too little, causes a dip in serotonin and once this happens, the ovaries produce less estrogen. This starts a vicious cycle of feeling bad.  Then again, too little progesterone is connected with anxiety because the hormone gives you a calming effect.

From early on in my marriage, until two months after I went off the pill, I used to be overwhelmed with the need to cry my eyes out every Friday with precise timing!  Wether I had reason to or not!  I could be totally happy or out about town and out of no where this need for release through tears will come over me!!! Let me clarify that I am NOT a cryer and never have been! 

4. Weight Gain!  While most birth controls are actually proven to not cause weight gain in the majority of people, doctors acknowledge that everyone responds differently to different medications.  Estrogen is known to increase inhibitory effect on appetite, meaning that having a lower estrogen level can make you hungrier.  Progesterone, on the other hand, does stimulate your appetite at its highest levels in the two weeks between ovulation and your period. Which is probably why you crave chocolate while you are PMSing. 

My gynecologist warned me about this, clarifying that its not the pill that makes you gain weight, but what you put in your mouth!  Self-control, which I lack when it comes to certain food; so he recommend that I take the pill before going to bed.  This reduced the tingling sensations the bc pill caused on my tongue, and thankfully I didn't gain weight due to the bc (just 5 lbs from my early attempts of cooking our favorite meals).  On the other hand, a family member of mine had to go off the pill because in the space of one year, she gained almost 20 pounds!

5. Blood Clots!!!  The FDA announced this week   that Yaz, Yasmin, Beyaz, Safyral and other newer birth control pills wil soon have a warning label that details the potential risks of developing a blood clot after you take the pills.  So, how would you know if you had a blood clot?  The FDA says that symptoms include persistent leg pain, severe chest pain, and shortness of breath.  You should call your doctor if you have any of these symptoms! 

6. Delays Conceiving!!! If you have been taking birth control pills and are planning to become pregnant soon, its a good idea to pin a date you intend to start "trying" and then go off your oral contraceptive a few months before that date.  Use a barrier method like condoms or a diaphragm as bc until you are ready to start trying.  Since your cycle is controlled by the pill, you normally will receive your mentruation every 26-28 days.  When you stop taking the pill, the contestant hormone level that surprises ovulation also stops.  Your body has to start its own hormone production and may sometimes need some time to regain its normal rhythm.  The overt itself hast to get ready so that an egg can mature and can be released.  Even though there are several hundred thousand eggs in your ovaries that are ready to mature, they may need some time before your first new ovulations.  You will want to conceive with a healthy strong egg produced by a clean ovary. Remember that the pill zaps your body of vital nutrients and minerals so you will need time and a healthy diet to rebuild them!

Several family members and friends of mine were trying to conceive and were thankfully successful last year; yet it took them between 6-8 months of trying due to the fact that then had been on the pill for several years.  I had been taking the pill for exactly one year and went off it in February. The first month my cycle came 31 days later and for the last two months its has arrived exactly 22 days apart. 

7. Constipation!!! I have always been regular to the point that you could set your clock to my bowl movements (sorry for the bluntness).  Yet just a month or two into the pill I was extremely delayed.  At the end of the first year I was getting desperate!  I am almost three months off the pill and even though I am a great deal better, I am still not back to normal.

If I had to do it again, I might go back on the pill for the first year or my marriage, but I would choose a pill that had less hormones and researched its symptoms and the chances that it would cause my body.  I am so relieved that I am off it now and am taking care of the amazing body that God has blessed us with!!!!  

P.S.  I had lazer removal treatments for my legs, pits and bikini areas.  The treatments were working fine until I went on the pill.  Its was not until MANY PAINFUL laser sessions later and after my sessions expired, that they informed me that the birth control pill contains hormons that over ride the lasers affectivness.   I had lost the money, sessions, and will have to do them again after I'm off the pill. I regret this so much!            

http://instagram.com/babyquezada